I can't believe it's not Beanfeast!

We've invented a new game here at Fieldbase which I have decided to call 'Suck it & See'. Every time someone goes shopping they have to bring back a random product for us all to try. Sometimes it's a hit i.e the discovery of Lux bars (otherwise known as 'I can't believe it's not Twix') and other times it's not such a winning idea - Meat Floss being a prime example (and a VERY bizarre name for a vegetarian sandwich filling that looks like loft insulation and tastes like beef!!) Unfortunately we have no say in the Jungle fodder we get given so I've been trying to introduce a few staples now so it's not such a big shock when all I have is Chicken (yeh right) Frankfurters and Greasy Dregs (AKA I can't believe it's not Beanfeast) for dinner! I kid you not, these are the two main ingredients I'll be taking in my backpack. Can you believe some American food giant probably paid a marketing think tank a fortune to brand their latest product and after days of endless brainstorming the best they could come up with is ... Greasy Dregs (Yuk!). I've tried to disguise the taste with curry powder, bolognaise sauce and even chicken soup but no matter what you do it still ends up tasting like trainer insoles!!!!!

Food aside, it's still going great here. The HCP's (Host Country Participants) arrived this morning. Nineteen Malaysian teenagers skulking down the drive! The girls all look like butter wouldn't melt and the guys spent most of the time looking at their trainers (God help me - you just know they'll all go nuts as soon as they hit the parent-free camp in the Jungle!) And even worse I'm heading off to the airport to meet 98 participants from the UK in the morning. So far I've got a Raleigh International t-shirt and a clip board to help me - think I might need to start drawing up a few lists!

I'm back off to Jungle Camp again tomorrow for the next week so defo no updates will be forthcoming for a while - can't wait! If I survive the swim tests, river crossings and Greasy Dreg suppers I'll be back in the office March 7th with a few tales to tell (hopefully not another one about trees collapsing in the middle of the night bringing hammocks with it !!!)

Weather update in case you're interested : It's Scorchio !!!!

Love ya

Vic x

In the Jungle.....

....the mighty jungle, the lion sleeps tonight. Well all I can say is fair play to the lion, he must have had a ruddy good pair of ear-plugs. Yes folks, I'm back and I survived JUMGLE CAMP!!!! I can now set up a solar-powered radio, dig a long drop, put up a hammock and basher, cook Greasy Dregs (yes, that's really what it's called!), and I can practically carry my own bodyweight.... uphill...in the rain! I now know what dry slops and wet slops are (nothing to do with bowel movements you'll be pleased to hear), I can tread water for 5 minutes (which is a lot longer than it sounds - especially in a current) and I can set up a safe camp fire without setting fire to myself and half of the Jungle. What I can't do however is work out where the hell I am!! Alas I am still a complete numpty when it comes to navigation and even wth the help of a map, compass and GPS, I still can't find my way to the end of the road, which is a slight worry considering I'll been wandering around a Jungle that has a distinct lack of sign posts. Hey ho, what's the worse that can happen?

I've got seven days till the 'young people' that we are suppose to be developing arrive and I have yet to make the big decision on wether I leave the comfort of my air conditioned office in field base and become a project manager on site (scarey). For any of you who saw the BBC Borneo programmes recently, you'll be very bemused to know that I could be heading for that very same camp in Imbak - yes the one that had the worlds most deadly centipede scurring around and big, fat scorpions leaping out of every second tree. Again I ask myself... what's the worst that could happen?

I'll mail again as soon as I know what I'm up to but for now I'll definitely be on email for another week. Well done for those who have worked out how to leave a message. All you have to do is click on the "comments" link below this and click on "Anonymous". That way you can leave a message without having to register. If you get a chance let me know what you're upto and the exact temperature at home (it's currently 31 here and it's 10 o clock at night!)

Enjoy your lovely comfy beds tonight and try not to think of me doing battle with my mossie net, deet spray and soaring temperature yet again.

Love to you all, Mrs Ray Mears x

Feeling hot, hot, HOT!

Holy Lord, I always thought the Wet Season referred to the amount of water that came out of the sky, not the amount of water seeping from my arm pits, forehead, and every little orifice on my entire body!! Without wanting to state the bloomin obvious - it is ruddy hot in Malaysia! But hey, hot I can deal with, I've done hot many, many times before - it's the humidity that's a shocker. I seriously had straight hair when I went out this morning and by the time I made it to the end of the drive I had a Michael Jackson perm circa 1972. Now I know you think I'm probably saying that in a lame attempt to be funny but that sad thing is - I'm not. I seriously have VERY curly hair that is currently circumnavigating my head about an inch away from my scalp. So much for using the 'working for charity' angle to bag myself a man. I haven't got a hope in hell.

Aside from the heat, humidity, permanent moist body state and ever increasing Fro, life in Borneo is ace. The piccie is of Raleigh International fieldbase (not bad eh!), where I currently live and will be for the next month. There's a team of 10 of us here preparing for the Spring Programme. We work, sleep, wash, eat, do yoga (yes even me!), play cards and general exist in one very large building that even at 3am has an average temperature of 31 degrees in any given room. I have to say the photo is particularly flattering and it's a bit like a big hostel inside but at the moment I love it. We have been warned that there is a severe danger of experiencing cabin fever pretty quickly and it's been likened to the Big Brother house by pretty much everyone already. I'm just waiting for the food shortages, challenges and general back stabbing bitchiness to kick in - can't wait!!

4 days till Jungle Camp - yipeeeeey xxx

We have lift off

For those of you I didn't manage to catch up with before I left it may come as a big surprise to hear that I'm in Malaysia (as you do!) and even more of a surprise to hear that I'm working!! I've signed up for three and a half months with Raleigh International - a youth development charity and I am currently sitting in their head office in Kota Kinabalu, Borneo.

I arrived two days ago without any major hiccups other than a 'Bangkok Surprise' on my second flight. No this doesn't mean a Thai prostitute popped up on the seat next to me, it means I was surprised that I went to Bangkok at all. I knew I was going via Kuwait and Kuala Lumpur but it seems that they threw in a three hour stopover in Thailand for free (just what you need in the middle of the night!)

Then on my last flight I encountered the Asian equivalent of Easyjet. I ended up fighting over what I thought was my seat number but what actually turned out to be the price I paid for the ticket (well how was I supposed to know it was free seating!). I was then so busy trying to avoid all the screaming children on the flight that I ended up sitting next to the only child-free adult on the plane who proceeded to burp his entire way through take-off. I kid you not, he did not stop. He just kept swallowing air and burping it back up. I was planning to move as soon as the seat belt sign went off when he just stopped and didn't emit a sound for the rest of the flight until he started burping again as soon as we started to land - very random.

So aside from a Bangkok Surprise and a windy Asian man, I made it over without too much hassle and have pitched up at a suburban house in Lintas. I'll be living here for the next few weeks to help get things up and running for when the project starts and the kids (sorry - young people) arrive (all 123 of them!). I seem to have a mammoth admin job on my hands but as you all know I am probably the only person on the planet who gets ridiculously excited by ring binder folders and coloured dividers. I was actually awake at 3.30am this morning planning my first file!

I'll keep updating this while I'm still at fieldbase and have access to the tinterweb but once they dispatch me into the jungle I may have to resort to smoke signals or a carrier pigeon to get word of my antics back home.

Keep checking in and feel free to leave a comment to let me know what you're up to.
More tomorrow
Vic xxxx